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Writer's pictureRebecca Fabiano

Trust is an Important Part of our Work with Young People, October 30, 2013


I’ve loved this TedTalk, by Adora Svitak, called: What Adults Can Learn From Kids since I first saw it more than two years ago. Since discovering, I’ve shown it every semester in the class I teach at the Community College of Philadelphia, called Foundations of Youth Work. Students are blown away by Adora’s public speaking skills, her confidence and sense of purpose and we always have a lively discussion.


I use this video as part of a conversation I facilitate about who do we want young people to be/come? It’s my belief that our work with children and youth is driven by the things we want for them and the people we know they can become. Rarely do people have a chance to really articulate these beliefs and these beliefs often sit in our subconscious. I want my students to know that when you bring those beliefs from the subconscious to the forefront, you can create amazing experiences for young people and develop meaningful relationships with them.

Typically, before showing the video, I start the class by having people reflect on the qualities they think all young people should have (this comes from a workshop that I was trained to deliver called Positive Discipline and was created by Development Without Limits, an organization I often consult with). I believe if we want young people to be(come) leaders then we can’t do things for them, rather we have to provide or facilitate opportunities for them to develop leadership skills. If we want them to be(come) confident, then we can’t berate them in front of their peers, rather we have to provide concrete feedback in respectful and helpful ways, and then give them a second chance.

Right after the video, I have students jot down responses to the following prompts, then discuss with a partner. This ensure that everyone gets a chance to share their reactions to the video: even the ones who may be reluctant to raise their hands.

  • jot down 5 words to describe your reaction to the video

  • jot down 3 words to describe Adora

  • what is a key idea or message that stands out to you?

After hearing from a few pairs, we then also talk about a few key points Adora makes. The first point she makes is about how young people have changed history. It’s important to take a minute to remind adults that kids are not just what we see on TV; in fact, it is often difficult to find positive pieces of news about young people and so I challenge students to observe the news/social media for one week for all the stories they hear about young people (that generates another lively discussion).

The next point she makes has to do with the fact that young people aren’t hampered by the same limitations as adults are when it comes to being creative, solving problems, etc. Imagine, if we included young people as solution-seekers when faced with a challenge; they are likely to make all kinds of suggestions we’d never think of. As Adora says: they just think of good ideas!

Something that always stands out to me EVERY time I watch this video, is when she talks about trust/lack of trust between adults and youth. In my work, I see time and time again how adults don’t trust young people and I see all of the restrictions we place on them. I think, in order to trust young people, in part, we have to also trust ourselves. By that I mean, that we have to trust it is okay that we don’t know everything; kids will still respect us, if we don’t know something, especially if we are willing to admit it. We can use that as a teachable moment to let kids know they don’t have to know everything or be perfect, and it’s a moment where we can even learn something alongside the young person(s).

And we have to trust that we’ve done our best to set kids up for success. This means having an intentional approach to our work. We must do this work with deliberateness. And we have to be prepared for kids who don’t quite get it (whatever the ‘it’ is) the first or even second or third time, and we have to be prepared to make adjustments if necessary. When this happens, we can ask ourselves, how can we turn to the young person and see them as a partner in making necessary changes?

So my challenge to you is to watch this video (watch it with a group of kids/young people!) and think about how you can build trust with young people; How can you create opportunities to partner with young people? And then let me know by posting a comment.





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